Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize