GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Randomize
