dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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