Where are you?
In a non slutty way
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
