so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
