my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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