yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
