That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize
