Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
her vagine was all disorganized.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
