Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
