his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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