"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Randomize
