Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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