We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize