and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Randomize
