I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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