yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize