She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
