We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Randomize
