Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Can you bring me the toilet please
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
