week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
We need to rekindle our bromance
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
