dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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