Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
