I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
