Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize