this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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