i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
