thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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