Your tits are I can't wait for
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
