She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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