she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
