I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
foreskin is a definite game changer
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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