no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Randomize
