Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
