My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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