This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize