He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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