Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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