Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
