You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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