I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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