do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
All I want is dick and wine.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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