I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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