yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
