Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
