i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
