How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
