so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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