I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
