just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
