Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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